whats the point of all this? (3 Viewers)

should i just give up


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yaveen

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like really, ive been losing sight of it all

i cant bring myself to study at all because this stress isn't real, it ends

everyday im told that this shit is so difficult, yet the same people say to not stress because everyone ends up in the same place. i get that its supposed to be reassuring to those who don't do well, but all that means for me is that the effort i put in is just useless

i cant see the purpose in being stressed about a number, i can see the purpose in being stressed about other things that actually contribute to fulfillment in life, but i got none of that. for nearly 6 years i just threw everything away for academics and got nothing out of it.

i can write essays, code websites, do well on exams, compress content and battle with deadlines.
but i barely got friends, can't see them anyway cuz i go out like once a month max, got no hobbies, no style, barely exercise, can't cook, street retarded, uncultured, integrityless, the list goes on

first place is a prison anyway.

what do i do?
 

quokka

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wow ur so real
anyway boiii dont give up but realign ur goals and give up in someplaces, does that make sense?
like does it actually benefit you burning out and trying so hard to come first? will it matter next year? ur answer should be no, so give up on that regard.
but dont give up totallyyyyyy, ill tell u what im doing to give up most of my stress.
so like im sorta like you, i rank decent yet ive got so much pressure from family and myself for wanting to rank well and get a great atar.
but me personally, id like to become a secondary high school teacher. which avg minimum is around 65 or something.
do u think i should get a 90? fuhhhh noo. yet i have pressure from everyone pushing me to get a 90, so what am i doing? giving up but not entirely
im going easier on myself w studying and stuff like that too
also like ive set myself a goal that i like and that i think is achieveable (a 75), so im working hard to achieve that for myself and literally no one else couldnt give zero fucks anymore abt anyone elses perceptions of me anymore
like remember this is all for a number...this is not serious at all tbh and no one asks for ur atar in uni... anyway does that make sense or is it too much yap also in regards to hobbies and stuff u need to stop putting school over urself ur mental health ur wellbeing and stuff like that that is what makes u become like that im being fr, u need to live bruh
 
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svad

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i feel this but for the opposite reason actually. I think I havn't sacrificed enough for my academics. I think I've totally flopped my internals and im struggling to find motivation to continue studying for trials and HSC. Its like, i've put in so much effort just for mediocre marks, is it even worth trying anymore? 😭
 

quokka

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like all this torment and stress that hsc is giving us is so fuckign useless unless ur aiming to be a doctor or dentist or in law or like engineneer some of us r normal and dont need to go thru this esp with outside factors
 

svad

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like all this torment and stress that hsc is giving us is so fuckign useless unless ur aiming to be a doctor or dentist or in law or like engineneer some of us r normal and dont need to go thru this esp with outside factors
Totally unrelated but omg someone else who does VET hospo on bos??? hello?? I feel like i've found gold 💀
 

quokka

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i feel this but for the opposite reason actually. I think I havn't sacrificed enough for my academics. I think I've totally flopped my internals and im struggling to find motivation to continue studying for trials and HSC. Its like, i've put in so much effort just for mediocre marks, is it even worth trying anymore? 😭
ur the only one that can push urself queen no one else, and if the marks are enough to get u where u wanna go who gaf
 

quokka

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I never paid attention in class bc I was supposed to drop in yr 11, but then i was forced to drop Software after we didnt have a teacher for it...so now im failing Hospo with no back up 💀 Its okay internals for VET doesnt even matter anyway...
wow omg so we BOTH failing amazing feel a bit better now
 

svad

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like really, ive been losing sight of it all

i cant bring myself to study at all because this stress isn't real, it ends

everyday im told that this shit is so difficult, yet the same people say to not stress because everyone ends up in the same place. i get that its supposed to be reassuring to those who don't do well, but all that means for me is that the effort i put in is just useless

i cant see the purpose in being stressed about a number, i can see the purpose in being stressed about other things that actually contribute to fulfillment in life, but i got none of that. for nearly 6 years i just threw everything away for academics and got nothing out of it.

i can write essays, code websites, do well on exams, compress content and battle with deadlines.
but i barely got friends, can't see them anyway cuz i go out like once a month max, got no hobbies, no style, barely exercise, can't cook, street retarded, uncultured, integrityless, the list goes on

first place is a prison anyway.

what do i do?
also, just finish what you've started. If you've sacrificed so much, don't let it go to waste now when it matters the most. Its just a few more months then you get a break from hell.
 

idkkdi

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like really, ive been losing sight of it all

i cant bring myself to study at all because this stress isn't real, it ends

everyday im told that this shit is so difficult, yet the same people say to not stress because everyone ends up in the same place. i get that its supposed to be reassuring to those who don't do well, but all that means for me is that the effort i put in is just useless

i cant see the purpose in being stressed about a number, i can see the purpose in being stressed about other things that actually contribute to fulfillment in life, but i got none of that. for nearly 6 years i just threw everything away for academics and got nothing out of it.

i can write essays, code websites, do well on exams, compress content and battle with deadlines.
but i barely got friends, can't see them anyway cuz i go out like once a month max, got no hobbies, no style, barely exercise, can't cook, street retarded, uncultured, integrityless, the list goes on

first place is a prison anyway.

what do i do?
every decision you make is your choice. focus on yourself. if you want to put in effort to get a higher atar that is your choice. if you want to do other things, that is also your choice

in hindsight, i would say for most people balance in life is always a good idea and better for their health. those who are happier without balance are usually pretty exceptional people but very rare
 

HazzRat

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like really, ive been losing sight of it all

i cant bring myself to study at all because this stress isn't real, it ends

everyday im told that this shit is so difficult, yet the same people say to not stress because everyone ends up in the same place. i get that its supposed to be reassuring to those who don't do well, but all that means for me is that the effort i put in is just useless

i cant see the purpose in being stressed about a number, i can see the purpose in being stressed about other things that actually contribute to fulfillment in life, but i got none of that. for nearly 6 years i just threw everything away for academics and got nothing out of it.

i can write essays, code websites, do well on exams, compress content and battle with deadlines.
but i barely got friends, can't see them anyway cuz i go out like once a month max, got no hobbies, no style, barely exercise, can't cook, street retarded, uncultured, integrityless, the list goes on

first place is a prison anyway.

what do i do?
generally, studying should feel habitual rather than a burden. it should feel like routine rather than the last day in a navy seal's hell week. i think if study makes you feel like this you're doing it wrong and unhealthily. for example, for people starting new years resolutions, the ones that build solid habits are more likely to succeed whilst the ones that rely on motivation don't. so instead just block out time in your schedule for study and leave to the rest to doing all the other things u want to do, and you will have a much healthier relationship with it. make it your routine but not your existence.
 

yaveen

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wow ur so real
anyway boiii dont give up but realign ur goals and give up in someplaces, does that make sense?
like does it actually benefit you burning out and trying so hard to come first? will it matter next year? ur answer should be no, so give up on that regard.
but dont give up totallyyyyyy, ill tell u what im doing to give up most of my stress.
so like im sorta like you, i rank decent yet ive got so much pressure from family and myself for wanting to rank well and get a great atar.
but me personally, id like to become a secondary high school teacher. which avg minimum is around 65 or something.
do u think i should get a 90? fuhhhh noo. yet i have pressure from everyone pushing me to get a 90, so what am i doing? giving up but not entirely
im going easier on myself w studying and stuff like that too
also like ive set myself a goal that i like and that i think is achieveable (a 75), so im working hard to achieve that for myself and literally no one else couldnt give zero fucks anymore abt anyone elses perceptions of me anymore
like remember this is all for a number...this is not serious at all tbh and no one asks for ur atar in uni... anyway does that make sense or is it too much yap also in regards to hobbies and stuff u need to stop putting school over urself ur mental health ur wellbeing and stuff like that that is what makes u become like that im being fr, u need to live bruh

lmao tyty
i need a 92+ for software eng but ngl software is js for the money and only cuz im good at it. i dont really want uni, or a job. i just want friends..
or, more specifically, the energy to maintain friends and whatever else i put on that list

i half blame my parents who shut down every hobby i had (photography, 3D modelling, code) because it took too much time out of studying and i did reclaim photography and code through joining clubs and choosing subject pathways and sure sometimes i remind myself "hey youve done stuff that you've dreamt of doing before" but its never truely satisfactory.

like i got so good at portrait photography that people would follow me around or ask me days in advanced for a photo, but the flip side of that is the pressure to cover every single event, and chase people up for photo consent, getting screamed at by superiors, etc. so i gave up
i skilled myself up with web design and web dev that I can build anything and yes i have done that, but the flip side of that is every project is a pressure-cooker and insurmountable variables need to be heaved together to form a cohesive product under deadlines that drive me to insanity. i still have some drive for that but web dev is my only real hobby that i intend to monetise

idk where my point is going tbh but ty for a comprehensive response lol
 

yaveen

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also, just finish what you've started. If you've sacrificed so much, don't let it go to waste now when it matters the most. Its just a few more months then you get a break from hell.
is the break real

everytime someone has said that i should work a little harder and then ill have time for myself, the time never comes
literally every single time for something that lasts longer than a day

so i think rn im just stuck in the state of trying to forge that time regardless of whatever the world demands, and either being guilty of it or being unsatisfied by it
 

yaveen

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generally, studying should feel habitual rather than a burden. it should feel like routine rather than the last day in a navy seal's hell week. i think if study makes you feel like this you're doing it wrong and unhealthily. for example, for people starting new years resolutions, the ones that build solid habits are more likely to succeed whilst the ones that rely on motivation don't. so instead just block out time in your schedule for study and leave to the rest to doing all the other things u want to do, and you will have a much healthier relationship with it. make it your routine but not your existence.
the problem is that ive barely studied over the past two weeks and theres only 14 days till trials. just like two hours for math and a few for biology, none for software or enterprise and a lot for english but thats just catchup.

i dont have enough self discipline for task switching; i get too tired if its more than 3 self-actioned switches in a day.

more often than not i start off strong by doing something productive and then after 40 minutes or so i just crawl back into a hole of self reflection and contemplation. it's hard to come out of it because its a contemplation of the very action that i intend to do coming out of it.

so its a cycle of trying to put my foot forward, contemplating if i should take the step or not, trying to do the thing, contemplating if its worth it, etc.

and honestly id rather do a navy seals hell week; it builds physical and mental rigidity, you're actually moving and feeling things in your body, there's teamwork and camaraderie instead of isolation and competition, success comes with feelings of achievement instead of inadequacy, and you come out of it realising that you could do that and more, instead of coming out of constant whatever tf this is and feeling like the drive to do more is external instead of internal
 

xoNat

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like really, ive been losing sight of it all

i cant bring myself to study at all because this stress isn't real, it ends

everyday im told that this shit is so difficult, yet the same people say to not stress because everyone ends up in the same place. i get that its supposed to be reassuring to those who don't do well, but all that means for me is that the effort i put in is just useless

i cant see the purpose in being stressed about a number, i can see the purpose in being stressed about other things that actually contribute to fulfillment in life, but i got none of that. for nearly 6 years i just threw everything away for academics and got nothing out of it.

i can write essays, code websites, do well on exams, compress content and battle with deadlines.
but i barely got friends, can't see them anyway cuz i go out like once a month max, got no hobbies, no style, barely exercise, can't cook, street retarded, uncultured, integrityless, the list goes on

first place is a prison anyway.

what do i do?
I think every time I got to this point during the hsc I kind of told myself that doing something is at the very least better than doing nothing. It's much better to slow down than stop completely. At that point I would be watching revision videos of early content or doing like 3 questions at a time. Take some time to focus on the things that you want to do, especially doing physical activity it helps so much. iirc school is basically starting now so just take the first maybe two afternoons of this week to have some free time - try not to think about studying at all. Then you can go back to trials study with the goal of just improving anything you can. If you really can't get any study out literally just go outside.

Also you mentioned that you wanna do software eng with a requirement of 92+ so I assume you're talking about UNSW. If so, I highly recommend checking out UNSW's portfolio entry scheme, the adjusted ATAR would be 85. Round 1 is just about to close but you can also apply for round 2.

On a side note you have so much time to figure out the kind of person you want to be and what you want to pursue in life. Just because y12 is so busy with the study grind don't lose sight of the bigger picture, I remember writing this really long list of all the things I wanted to do in the break between end of HSC and uni and I'm still working through it now.
 

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